Dear Museveni,
I'm pleased to inform you that your application to
join the university of Dar Es Salaam has been accepted. Also great to know that
Tanzania will offer you your intrinsic ambition of learning how to fight using
a gun. Tanzania is a great breeding ground for future Ugandan leaders
considering that your country has been faced with turbulent post-independence
years.
I'm glad that at your age, you have been able to
discern that your tribesmen need not to move anymore looking for pasture and
water. Thanks for greatly advising them to settle and fence their farmlands.
Also, in your youthful knowledge, you
have acknowledged that colonialism has left complex political and economic
institutions in your country, which are even worse than the ones you had before
colonialism. I'm quite sure you know that precipitated authoritarianism,
absolutism, economic decline and poverty are as a result of such weak and
complex institutions.
But here you are my wise young friend, organised and
optimistic, you will need to find a cult following among your peers at
University, you will get organized and help defeat Idi Amin(you know the
trouble he's causing in your country). After that, you will need to engage in
clean elective politics with those who will have survived Amin's brutal regime.
If such cases of absolutism, nepotism, tyranny or
corruption ever arise again, you will need to wage a guerrilla war against the
government. I believe with some education, chary optimism, experience in
guerrilla warfare and a cult following from especially your rural strongholds,
you will be successful.
My young wise friend, the bright looks future (sorry....the
future looks bright) for you. You will meet stumbling blocks along the way, you
will endure hardships, you will sleep hungry for days, your men will get
injured.....and forgive my honesty.......some will perish along the way. But my
friend, do not give up. Don't listen to naysayers. Keep motivated and keep your
dream alive!
Good News!
God has seen a Moses in you. You will lead your countrymen to the
promised land. You will transform your country into an economic hub. You will
bring peace and harmony to your people. You will be labeled among the new breed
of African leaders. Your name will be venerated among your people......and
after retiring, you will leave a very quiet, peaceful and happy life in
wherever you wish on this planet. Your sons and grandchildren will also leave a
happy life.
BUT
PLEASE! PLEASE! Do not be corrupt, Do not use your power to persecute innocent
people, Do not appoint only your tribesmen in key positions. do not be a tyrant
dictator. And above all, DO NOT OVER
STAY IN POWER. Because if you do, your armed struggle shall have been
wasted! Your years in Tanzania, your
injuries, your sacrifices, your hardships in deep jungles will have been
wasted! They shall all be null and void! You will be loathed by your respectful
countrymen. And at the end, you will find it quite hard to leave power. Please!
Don't let all this happen!
Yours,
Your 72 year old friend.
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